Decor 1: From Precure to Breeder [Video/Action for Newbark]

[pikajanken]

 [The feed starts focused on some green grass until there's a closeup shot of a Mareep. Suddenly there's a girl's voice and the sound of rushed footsteps coming closer.]

Candy--! You shouldn't be wandering away like that! Oh, it's on...

[Someone picks up the pokegear and it's a young middle school-aged girl.]

U-uh, Hi. My name's Yayoi Kise....and this is Candy. [The Mareep jumps into Yayoi's arm and of course her Static ability activates and...]

KYAA! I-I'm okay....I've been hit by worse... [There's still some linger static and her eye twitched but she'll live. She clears her throat.]

Um, anyway it's nice to meet you.  And is there anyone who help me about this "breeding" stuff? I didn't get all of it the first time around.

Comments

[video]

[preparetrouble]

[ ....she had refrained so well from stooping to nitpick the network lately. She had remained so free from distraction, focusing instead on advancement (and on the fact that the building above the base had - caught fire? - recently - this place is an undisciplined wreck, seriously), but this message sets her skin crawling.

So heeeeere's Scanty. ]

In your position, I wouldn't worry. Scatterbrained attempts at guiding reproduction can only end in disaster.

[video]

[pikajanken]

W-what? That's kind of unfair to judge like that.

I won't know unless I try though!

[video]

[preparetrouble]

Tsk, tsk.

[ She shakes her head. An impeccably-groomed, glossy Houndour comes and takes a seat beside her. ]

And how will you take responsibility for your failures, then? New, inbred lives will come into existence on your account! Are you really prepared for the resulting training? The shame? The child welfare payments?

[ Okay, that last one's an exaggeration. ]

Well, your willingness to learn does you credit, I suppose. Misguided good intentions might yet produce better results than the usual haphazard profligation.

[video]

[pikajanken]

[Ooh nice Houndour. Oh wait, she's getting distracted.]

Inbreeding? Oh no I wouldn't do that. That's why I'm asking so I won't make those mistakes. A book can only tell you much compared to personal experience. I'm going to do my best even if I make mistakes. I'll take care of my pokemon and make sure some of them find a good trainer too.

[video]

[preparetrouble]

[ Ah, you noticed? Don't mind if she preens her Houndour a little, then. But subtly. It's purely an accident she's calling attention to how well-raised her Pokémon are! A happenstance! A coincidence! ]

The first step to improvement is admission of your failings. Yet the rabble on this network will only lead you astray.

....In that case, it can't be helped. Prepare a pencil and paper, girl. I'll explicate the most self-evident rrrrules.

[video]

[pikajanken]

[She's already gotten her notepad and pencil ready.]

I'm ready when you are!

[video]

[preparetrouble]

Very well.

[ And with a pause for breath, class is now in session! ]

Firstly, you mentioned something about a "book". I presume this means you received written instructions. While your distrust of anything handed to you by this disorganized an operation betrays a surprising amount of discretion, I urge you not to belittle the written word. Formal guidelines remain humanity's sole point of separation from their more primal kin, their first ascension out of the evolutionary morass, and should both be respected and followed accordingly. Should your understanding of this manual fall short, you have only yourself to blame.

[ Scanty begins to pace, one finger raised in the air for emphasis. ]

Secondly, unsatisfactory parents will never produce satisfactory offspring, and should be discouraged from mating accordingly. Display restraint in all you do. Capture only the most intelligent of creatures; permit them to ingest no more than one-and-a-quarter cups of food at a time - size of the animal permitting flexibility in this matter; maintain a training regimen of at least three hours a day, with exercises covering every basic muscle group; introduce them to members of the opposite sex only once their bodies and minds attain a sleekness as exhibited here.

[ The Houndour puts its nose in the air, almost imitating its master. ]

This will ensure you a well-formed child with a mind prepared to receive further training. Above all, don't permit excessive or uncontrolled mingling. The drive for fornication among mere animals is excessive enough without accidental encouragement....

...you are taking this all down, correct?

[video]

[pikajanken]

[While Scanty goes on, Yayoi furiously takes down notes. She even had to write on a second page. When she gets addressed, she panics for a second.]

Y-yes, I am! Thank you for sharing this information with me!

[video]

[preparetrouble]

[ How diligent! Something might indeed be made of you yet. Yes, this encounter has proven most gratifying.

Scanty smirks. ]

It's the least I can do.

Are you prepared for the final segment?

video

[pikajanken]

[She's even got a new page ready.]

Yes, I am!

[video]

[preparetrouble]

[ Yes, now that she's had a chance to examine you closely, you're demonstrating real promise! Scanty's extremely pleased. ]

Your diligence does you credit, girl. And you'll need it for this final step.

You see, your Pokémon look to you as a mentor, don't they? A devoted master, an admired model, the ultimate pinnacle to which they aspire! Yet your current attire, and your deportment, well...

[ She looks troubled. ]

Isn't that slovenly costume and wide-eyed simpleness letting down their faith in you?